Sunday, September 30, 2012

The Sad Face from Asia

This face needs a kiss. This girl needs a hug. I'll do both. How sweet is she!

Who can provide the best tag line?

Examples: Someone stole my fluffernutter!
                This headband is killing me!

Saturday, September 29, 2012

Fluff Fluff Fluff Fluff Fluff Fluffernutter

I've been addicted to peanut butter and marshmallow fluff sandwiches lately. I get so hungry at 10 o'clock at night and I need food. That's why I have the figure I do. Lately "fluffernutters" have done the trick for me.

Is this just a back east thing? There are not many people out west that I've heard of doing this. If you have never tried it, DO. It will make your midnight snacking so much more efficient and enjoyable. Speaking of midnight snacks, are there any you enjoy?

Just found the coolest videos online about the making of a fluffernutter. Enjoy! Watch them both, they are like 30 seconds each.

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Apostles and Football

My boy and I went to the BYU vs. Hawaii football game. While we were walking in the parking lot of the stadium we ran into Elder D. Todd Christofferson of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles.

He stuck out a little - not too many people attend college football games in suits. We were able to shake his hand and he asked Evan what his name was. As we walked away, Evan watched him walk away for a few seconds with a perplexed look on his face. He then asked me: "I thought apostles did, like, important stuff?"

My boy, football is important.

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Friday, September 28, 2012

Oldie but a Goodie

Poop is something you become pretty familiar with as a parent. It gets on your hands, on your clothes, and on your carpet. When our third was a year old, she went into the bathroom and someone forgot to flush. She took out a ball of poop and started munching. She then started gagging. I ran to her in the hallway, saw her clenched fist, opened it up, and saw the wet tootsie rolls. Only they weren't tootsie rolls.

This past week my youngest did the same, only she pulled out used toilet paper and started sucking away. Man I need to teach my kids to flush.

With all this in mind, if you want to avoid disgusting family experiences with poop and other things that belong in the toilet, check out this article that was sent to me by the good folks at on how to childproof the bathroom.

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Faces on the Bathroom Floor

I spend a lot of time in the bathroom. Sometimes I go into trances and end up staring aimlessly at the floor. I'm sure we've all done this. On certain occasions,  I see famous people on my bathroom floor. The shapes come together and I see things in a new light.

For instance, last night somehow the shapes turned into this:

Yeah, I saw Dennis Rodman on my bathroom floor. So, I asked my wife if I'm crazy, or if she has seen things on the bathroom floor, and she has. It's not just me. So, who have you seen on your bathroom floor?

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Thursday, September 27, 2012

A Phone for a Vote?

I have no idea if this is true, but it is hilarious to listen to. YOU GOT OBAMA PHONE!!!!!!!
Check out the video below.

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Replacement Referees and Obama

I neither support nor oppose this message, but I do laugh.

Music and the Spoken Word

Have you ever watched the short videos they play during Music and the Spoken Word? As the Mormon Tabernacle Choir sings "Love at Home" or "I Feel My Savior's Love" they shows videos of families, moms, dads, children walking peacefully in the serene meadows. They might show mom walking hand in hand with her daugther, or a father throwing his child lovingly in the sweet air. The longer I've been watching this program the more it has become apparent why these scenes are so sweet and beautiful. They all show families with 1, 2, MAYBE 3 kids. I don't think I've ever seen a family with more than 4 kids. And that was one time.

(Start at 5:30 and watch to the end...Funny!)

If they showed the Mormon family with 5 or more kids, the video might start off sweet with Mom talking lovingly to her daughter, but then the music would stop as 2 kids ran by the camera yelling at each other and other kid cries because he wants some fruit snacks. Dad would be on the computer while Mom glares at him in frustration because he is oblivious to his surroundings and baby would be in the bathroom putting her hands in the toilet.

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Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Who has the theory?

A few people requested I post this video, but I don't want to dwell on this too often anymore. I'm trying to post about positive things for the most part. So please forgive me.

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Tuesday, September 25, 2012

What's your dirt?

It's amazing how when things get down to the wire politically, there always seems to be some dirt to bring up. Whether it be Romney's tax returns (who cares?), Obama's birth certificate (we should all care) or a myriad of other baggage that seems to float to the surface, it makes me wonder what people would dig up on me. I don't think I have anything to hide. Do you?

Or maybe I do??

Monday, September 24, 2012

Coke or Pepsi?

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Sunday, September 23, 2012

Read the Instructions - Nah!

So I don't often brag about my GPA in High School, but today I will. My GPA was...(drumroll please): 2.833. That's right. 2.833. Not 2.83, but 2.833. I feel that extra 3 gives it some more robustness. Now, why in the world would I want to brag about that? Here's why: I did it all without ever reading any directions. For homework, quizzes, tests, I never read the directions. (I don't know why I listed homework, I never really did homework). I just assumed I knew what they were asking. I still pulled off a B average. That's pretty impressive. I bet you couldn't have done that. Sure, you probably got a 4.0, but you knew what the teacher was asking you to do. Easy peasy.

I compare it to being a wonderful bench player in the NBA while being blind. Sure, you might lead the NBA in scoring, but you have your eyesight.

Saturday, September 22, 2012

Spirit Week - Fake an Injury Day

My kids school is celebrating Spirit week. On Tuesday of next week it will be "Fake an Injury Day." I really really really want Evan to go to school dressed as a soccer player. Get it? If not, watch this clip of soccer players faking injuries and you'll get it.

Friday, September 21, 2012

Noah's Ark - The Real Story

You've either never read the Bible or you are a liar, because Noah did not bring two of each animal. He brought fourteen of each clean animal and four of each unclean animal. Read it for yourself. And weep. Then when you are done crying, throw away all your children's books that show two animals boarding the ark. Then write new books showing fourteen and four. Then you will be happier. Or maybe buy the board game below and play it with the right number of animals.

Genesis Chapter 7:

 1 And the Lord said unto Noah, Come thou and all thy house into the ark; for thee have I seen righteous before me in this generation.

 2 Of every clean beast thou shalt take to thee by sevens, the male and his female: and of beasts that are not clean by two, the male and his female.

 3 Of fowls also of the air by sevens, the male and the female; to keep seed alive upon the face of all the earth.

Thursday, September 20, 2012

Oh Poop.

Can I say something without being judged? Probably not, because when people say things it molds our view and opinion of them. I'm going to say this anyway: I hate dogs. I really think I hate them. Well, hate is a strong word and they can be so cute and fun, but then they can smell and lick and shed and poop.

So...why this post? Yesterday I was at my boy's baseball game sitting in the grass with my daughter. We were chatting and enjoying the weather and then I stood up for a moment to stretch my legs and I smelled something very wrong. 

I looked on the ground and saw that I had been, for the past ten minutes, sitting in dog poop. Yes sir. I was sitting in DOG POOP. The worst part of it all was there was nothing I could do about it. The game had barely started, I was there with all the kids and Gina was at home. The bathroom had no paper towels. So I got to stand around with someone else's poop on my bottom for an hour. Yay me. 

Therefore, and that is why, I hate dogs. 

Please feel free to buy one of these excellent pooper scoopers and pick up after your nasty animals. Thank you. All proceeds will go to the Price is Right so that your pets will be fixed.

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

Facebook Politics

I saw this status on FB today but could not respond because I don't want my alias to comment on posts. So I had to respond on my blog. This is what a friend's status said:

"Evangelicals are behind Mitt Romney! Are the Mormons? Of course I don't believe that every Mormon has to be a Republican (my parents were Democrats), and I don't believe anyone should vote for someone just because they're the same race or religion, but why wouldn't you be for an honest, hardworking leader who's served as a missionary, a bishop, a stake president, and a governor, is a great husband, father, and grandfather, and has the education, experience, and knowledge to lead others to success? And if you think he's not "down to earth", don't believe the media, believe the people who truly know him! Since when was being wealthy a bad thing? And, by the way, he's so tight with his money he packed, moved, and drove his own U-Haul to his new home in CA!!! Just saying!"

Before I let Mitt address the reasons I can't support him, let me just say that I'm sure Mitt is a great man. I know he's charitable and kind. I don't care that he makes lots of money and only pays 15% tax, in fact I think those are great things. What I have learned is that he is naive. He supports so many pieces of legislation that go against the Constitution and then he defends himself by saying: "I don't think anyone would abuse this power.". But Mitt, that is exactly why we have the Constitution, so powers aren't abused. We don't change the Constitution and then assume people will do the right thing.

Here is my response to the Facebook post in Mitt's own words:

My least favorite part: (:53) "I don't think he's going to abuse this power". That's why we have the constitution, so powers won't be abused.

My least favorite part: (:11) "You sit down with your attorneys and tell you what you have to do..". The Constitutions states you are not allowed to go to war without a declaration of war.

My least favorite part: (1:44)  "The Patriot Act is a useful tool". Benjamin Franklin said: "They who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety."

I won't even go into his opinions of the Federal Reserve, War in general, etc...I could place 20 more clips on here, but I've gotten bored. Toodles.

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

For the Bible tells me so

Some say that the Holy Bible is fiction. I say truth is stranger than fiction. Case and point, Judges chapter 13 and 14. It goes like this:

Samson decides he wants to marry a Philistine woman. He tells his parents, "Get her for me, for she pleaseth me well." They travel to get the woman. In the meantime, Samson kills a lion with his bare hands. Then some bees start making honeycomb in the carcase of the lion. Samson comes back and eats the honeycomb and then gives some to his parents.

Then Samson gets his woman. He then tells a riddle to thirty Philistines. He gives them seven days to figure it out. After three days, they have no clue. They try to get it out of his wife. After multiple days of her whining to him, he finally tells her. She tells the answer to the men. They come to Samson and tell him the answer. He says, "You got the answer out of my heifer." He slays the thirty men. Then he gives his wife away to a friend. The end.

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Tuesday, September 11, 2012

An Anniversary Prayer - 9/11

An Anniversary Prayer – September 11, 2012

Catherine’s Anniversary Prayer — September 11, 2012

By Catherine Austin Fitts

Lord, we gather in prayer on the eleventh anniversary of 9-11;
We thank you for the many blessings you have given us,
among them the gift of life;
Let our hearts be in your heart, our mind in your mind;
Help us to speak life into this anniversary and this day.

We pray for those who lost their lives on 9-11;
We pray for the families who lost loved ones;
We pray for those who lost friends and colleagues;
We pray for those who lost companies, jobs, and resources;
We pray for those who risked their lives and health and whose courage and sacrifice lifted us through this time;
We give thanks for the grace they have brought to this earth;
We pray for the people and the land of New York, Pennsylvania, and northern Virginia;
We pray for all who have suffered and sacrificed in the wars and politics these events were used to justify.

We pray for the perpetrators of the events of 9-11;
We pray for those who exploited these events;
We pray for all who have profited;
We pray for all of us whose participation in unhealthy thoughts, disinformation and
systems has facilitated more killing, more war;
May that which has been stolen be restored;
May we all be restored to your love and your peace.

We give thanks to the millions of people who have contributed to our understanding of these events;
We give thanks for independent media;
We give thanks for independent journalists and investigators; authors, engineers, architects and scientists, concerned citizens;
Lord, protect them, encourage them, lift them up and let them feel today our appreciation and our admiration;
They have stood between us and the abyss:
They are “the repairer of the breach, the restorer of paths to dwell in.”
Let our resources gather to replenish and refresh them— their best is yet to come.

Lord, we know you have not given us a spirit of fear, but of power, of love and of a strong mind;
Allow the light of truth to shine and spread; to restore, to heal; and to illuminate pathways to heal hearts and rebuild the wasted places.

Today, on this special day, we celebrate that all things are possible.

We give praise and restoration in the name of Jesus,


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Friday, September 7, 2012

A Wonderfully Horrible Thought

I was on my way to a viewing last night and was trapped in my car so I decided to listen to the coverage of the Democratic National Convention. I listened to Joe Biden's speech which people loved but for me didn't include any specifics, just a lot of fluff, like most speeches do. I had the most horrible thought as I was listening to this man. I realized that this is the 2nd most powerful man in the United States, and if Obama were to die he would be President. Yikes. Now, I don't really believe he has much power, nor do I believe Obama has much power. I believe they are both puppets. Regardless, to state that we are the most powerful nation on the earth and Biden is one of the top two in charge, it gave me a good laugh.

Monday, September 3, 2012

Remembering 9/11 Part V- The Last Phone Call

Stop. Everything. Pick up your cell phone. Pretend you have 30 seconds to live. Who do you call? What do you say? 

This short documentary will give you a feel for what many of those in the WTC buildings had on their mind. You sense the fear, you sense the love, you sense the uncertainty. 

God Bless these people and their families. I hope they find healing and comfort in the degree they need it.

Oh, and tell your loved ones how much you love them today.

Sunday, September 2, 2012

War and the Golden Rule

These two clips are amazing. The first one talks about our culture of war and the last quote contained in the video is one from Joseph Smith and I literally yelled out "O crap!" when I read it. Don't miss it!

I know I post a lot of videos, but please find the time to view them. Youtube is almost as important as the printing press. (I'm not kidding)

All Mormons Vote For Romney

This post includes a blog post written by Dr. Jack Monnett to Mitt Romney. It essentially contains the objections he has with his views. I'm posting this because I'm very concerned about the perception that people might have that all Mormons are voting for Romney. Especially after the Mormons in America bit on Rock Center, where it just seems like everyone thinks all Mormons will automatically vote for him.

My philosophy has always been this: The only thing more disturbing than not voting for a presidential candidate because of his religion, is someone who does vote for them because of their religion. I often wonder if all the Mormon Romney supporters I come into contact with actually have studied his voting record and his policies.

This post is dedicated to my non-Mormon friends so they can see some of the objections I have with Romney. If Mormons have studied his policies and agree with him and feel he is the best for our country, then that is their prerogative.

Mitt Romney Schooled with an Open Letter from Dr. Jack Monnett
Posted on June 26, 2012 by admin

Mitt Romney “aspiring to the honors of men” and seemingly“ambitious,” dishing out “hollow promises” like other “scheming leaders” of our day.

Dear Mitt,

A few years ago, I was also involved in the 2002 Olympics held in Salt Lake City. Although not in such an auspicious role as you held, I nonetheless was able to watch your actions and gather certain impressions. Sadly, the primary impression that I had was that you were able to manipulate public relations and that you were a “grandstander.” The 2012 presidential electioneering has done little to alter that impression.

“Grandstanding” is another way to say that your actions were heralded and seen by others for their media attention and not for their inherent goodness. In the LDS Church we generally call that motivation “aspiring to the honors of men” with a person’s “heart set so much on the things of this world” (D&C 121:35) that principles are forsaken. It is that same “grandstanding” that brought you the nickname “Flip-Flop” Romney–earned because of your desire to appeal to everyone rather than demonstrating consistency with principles. You’ve been in favor of abortion and then against it and finally have said that you are neither pro-choice nor pro-life; in favor of auditing the fed but in favor of leaving it as it is; been on both sides of the global warming debate; been on both sides of the proposed same-sex marriage amendment; touted your mandatory healthcare legislation in Massachusetts while backtracking from its primary provisions; declined to sign a “no new taxes pledge” and then said that you had signed and stood behind it; agreed that illegal aliens should be able to seek citizenship but then said that they should not; said that same-sex couples should have the right to adopt children and then said that you were against such adoptions; and while later denying that you supported the stimulus program under George W. Bush, earlier statements of support demonstrate that that you did.

The above “flip-flops” were clear statements made to appease both those for and against the above issues. Obviously, for the person desiring to know you, there is confusion–there always seems to be a quotation to justify any particular Romney belief. When President Gordon B. Hinckley gave his stirring address, “A Testimony Vibrant and True” in August of 2005, he have a synopsis of the Book of Mormon for our time and said that the chronicled events in that book were “as current as the morning newspaper.” He went on to relate the scriptural story that “the people succumbed to the wiles of ambitious and scheming leaders who oppressed them with burdensome taxes [and] who lulled them with hollow promises.” Few can question your “ambition,” but especially because of your ambiguity, many more have come to question your “hollow promises.”

President Hinckley continued his remarks with another observation that is particularly relevant today: “These evil schemers led the people into terrible wars that resulted in the death of millions and the final and total extinction of two great civilizations in two different eras.” He was alluding to Moroni’s evaluation of the role of the Gadiantons given in the book of Ether, that “they have caused the destruction of the [Jaredites] and also the destruction of the people of Nephi.” (Ether 8:21) This was, as he said, a definite parallel to our day “as current as the morning newspaper.” That, of course, had specific reference to nonending wars on terror used to justify various aggressive invasions throughout Kuwait, Afghanistan, and Iraq, while preparing for further actions in Syria, Iran, and other far-off countries.

In fact, although you were on both sides of the Vietnam War (agreeing with your father at one time and later stating that you had desired to be a part of the fighting forces) your views on war have been consistently hawkish. You supported the invasion of Iraq and the subsequent troop surge; you are on record calling for “blockade, bombardment and surgical military strikes” against Iran; and have recommended an additional 100,000 troops to the United States military. Of current war tactics, you have said that you would double the size of the Guantanamo facility; you have defended the use of “enhanced interrogation techniques” including waterboarding; and have voiced approval of military leaders continuing the policy of refusing judicial review for terrorist prisoners.

The Lord is quite specific in Section 98 of the Doctrine & Covenants that preemptive warfare (a Bush Doctrine continued through America’s current administration) violates his commandments. Perhaps you recall an address by President Spencer W. Kimball wherein he said that: “Men depend on armaments as on idols. O foolish men who think the protect the world with armaments, battleships, and space equipment when only righteousness is needed!” That almost sounds like a reaction during the GOP debates wherein one of your opponents suggested that continual warfare and militarism breeds problems rather than solves them and then asked, “Were the shoe on the other foot, how would we react to such military invasion and occupation?” President Kimball continued: “We look to foreign programs, summit conferences, land bases. We depend on fortifications, or gods of stone; upon ships and planes and projectiles, our gods of iron–gods which have no ears, no eyes, no hearts. We pray to them for deliverance and depend upon them for protection.… we train a man in the art of war and call him a patriot, thus, in the manner of Satan’s counterfeit of true patriotism we pervert the Savior’s teachings.”

Your stance on war is a particular issue that forms a wedge between you and the teachings you embraced from the Church in which you were raised. Whereas scriptures emphatically declare that we should “Renounce war and proclaim peace,” (D&C 98:16) your various statements have proclaimed otherwise. Our Founding Fathers, of whom LDS scripture explain were raised for the very purpose of pioneering our Constitution and laying the groundwork for a free country, (D&C 101:77–80) were adamantly opposed to warfare. Perhaps James Madison, the primary author of the Constitution, said it best: “Of all the enemies to public liberty war is, perhaps, the most to be dreaded, because it comprises and develops the germ of every other. War is the parent of armies; from these proceed debts and taxes; and armies, and debts, and taxes are the known instruments for bringing the many under the domination of the few.… No nation could preserve its freedom in the midst of continual warfare.”

Can you think of a time during your lifetime when war was not present? Doesn’t our recent history, and your various statements about warfare parallel Mormon’s observation that: “It is impossible for tongue to describe, or for man to write a perfect description of the horrible scene of the blood and carnage which was among the people.” (Mormon 5:4)

Many of those who would follow you are concerned about your apparent disregard for the Constitution and its companion, the Bill of Rights. As you know from your reading, the Lord had specific reference to them when he said: “That law of the land which is constitutional, supporting that principle of freedom in maintaining rights and privileges, belongs to all mankind, and is justifiable before me.” He then counseled his followers to “befriend that law which is the constitutional law of the land.” (D&C 98:5–6)

Your Church has looked toward the overriding rationale of the United States Constitution as a document that supports “that principle of freedom in maintaining rights and privileges.” Obviously, anything of a mandatory nature flies in the face of freedom; yet, mandatory healthcare (often referred to as Romneycare) is compulsory and only exists by mandate. All studies apparently agree that as a system of healthcare it is abrasively costly but, even more disconcerting, it violates not only the initial premise of the Constitution, but invades individual rights and desires for free choice of coverage. Yet, you claim authorship and even show pride in its adoption on a national level.

You understand that befriending the Constitution literally means knowing it and becoming friends with it. In a debate, however, you unabashedly admitted that you didn’t know it and deferred a Constitutional question to one of your opponents. What a dangerous precedent when the following verse of scripture unequivocally states that “whatsoever is more or less than this, cometh of evil.” You would agree that there is accountability–especially for one chosen to guide the course of a free nation.

Others have written about your disregard for the nation’s Second Amendment–the private ownership of firearms. Although you variously answered questions about your own gun ownership and eventually even joined the NRA and said that you hunted small game; as a political student and leader, you know that the Second Amendment has virtually nothing to do with hunting and everything to do with protection from abusive leaders. Your encouragement of the misnamed “assault weapons” ban and the government-aided determination of what weapons can be owned by whom once having procured government permission cannot be looked upon in any other way than infringement on the right to bear arms.

Most egregious to Constitutional protections have been your support of the National Defense Authorization Act (NDAA) and the USA PATRIOT Act (Uniting and Strengthening America by Providing Appropriate Tools Required to Intercept and Obstruct Terrorism). As you know, both significantly veer from Constitutional protections. Whereas our Fourth Amendment ensures Americans against “unlawful search and seizure,” the PATRIOT Act allows homes to be entered and searched without probable cause. Likewise, the PATRIOT Act trumps the Sixth Amendment written to ensure a speedy and public trial by negating the right to trial and allowing indefinite imprisonment. The NDAA reinforces the PATRIOT Act by denying trial and the right of habeus corpus to those accused (not found guilty) of perceived terrorism.

You have spoken often about the U.S Constitution and its lofty beginnings and protections. You, more so than most Latter-day Saints, understand the scriptural warning that “whatsoever is more or less than this cometh of evil.”

Both the “evil schemers” that President Hinckley referred to in the Book of Mormon, and the “awful situation” that Moroni warned modern-day readers about, have direct reference to Gadianton destruction that permeates the scripture. Nowhere do readers find that as prevalent as in the book of Helaman where they were engaged in “all manner of wickedness, contrary to the laws of their country and also the laws of their God.” (Helaman 6:22) Leaders were obviously undermining Constitutional laws with laws that were unjust, thereby “trampling under their feet the commandments of God and turning unto their own ways [to] build up unto themselves idols of their gold and their silver.” (Helaman 6:31) Little wonder that the Lord would later say that “whatsoever is more or less that this cometh of evil.”

Mormon, in abridging Helaman’s book, warned readers about Gadianton influence today. He explained how they secretly operated by “filling the judgment seats–having usurped the power and authority of the land; laying aside the commandments of God.” (Helaman 7:4) In this way “they did obtain the sole management of the government.” (Helaman 6:39) Thus they were “held in office at the head of government, to rule and do according to their wills, that they might get gain and glory of the world.” (Helaman 7:5)

Mitt, you know that government wields a two-edged sword. Although none of us are quite certain of the far-reaching consequences of its misuse, all Latter-day Saints know the sacred role of the Constitution and its precepts. To all of us, but particularly to political leaders as yourself, Section 134 of the Doctrine & Covenants recounts that: “We believe that governments were instituted of God for the benefit of man; and that he holds men accountable for their acts in relation to them, both in making laws and administering them, for the good of safety and society.” Such laws “will secure to each individual the free exercise of conscience, the right and control of property, and the protection of life.” (D&C 134:1–2)

I am deeply concerned about the above cited issues and the directions that you have chosen to respond to them. They are troubling because as a potential president of our country, weighty decisions could be made to significantly curtail our liberties, not only perpetuating but under the guise of conservatism, actually expanding such encroachment.
Dr. Jack Monnett

Dr. Jack Monnett
Jack Monnett is a contemporary historian who particularly writes about educational themes as they intertwine with Latter-day Saint history. Jack holds degrees in education from Brigham Young University and a Ph.D. in the Historical Foundations of Education from the University of Utah. He has taught in the LDS Church Educational System as well as in public schools, and currently teaches part-time for BYU Continuing Education. Brother Monnett has previously served as a bishop and as a member of a stake presidency.

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Gordon B Hinckley

"The people succumbed to the wiles of ambitious and scheming leaders who oppressed them with burdensome taxes, who lulled them with hollow promises, who countenanced and even encouraged loose and lascivious living. These evil schemers led the people into terrible wars that resulted in the death of millions."

This quote was about the Nephites and Lamanites given by Gordon B. Hinckley in a talk in August of 2005 when he extended the invitation for all the read the Book of Mormon by the end of the year. It's interesting how much this quote sounds like what's going on it our day. Remember, King Noah taxed 20%. We're over 50% in our day.

Here's a link to that talk, well worth the read: