A Reason To Be Thankful
It's been bitter cold these past few weeks. Bitter cold. The
"this makes me not want to ever go outside" kind of cold. Temperatures in the low teens every day, sometimes dropping into the frigid single digits. It's all I can do to make it from the door to my car that is parked in the garage. I'm just glad there is never a significant windchill here in Utah.
The severity of the cold triggered a distant memory that I had all but forgotten. It was one of those moments in life when you sit back and think, "Thank God that I'm blessed with what I have."
In March of 2008 we were driving back from a family vacation and we made our way through scenic Wyoming. It was getting pretty late and after fighting with some severely tired eyes we decided that it would be a good time to stop at a motel for the night. We found some cheap, musty hotel just off the freeway and I ran inside to book the room. The freezing air whipped all around me as I jumped back in the car with room key in hand. We found our parking spot and I jumped out to unload the kids and the necessary bags for our quick night's stay.
I opened the back door of the car and lifted up my 4 year-old boy who was fast asleep. We had to climb some stairs to get to our room, and their were lots of bags to haul in, so I needed him to stand up and walk by himself. When I placed him on the ground he stumbled drowsily and the howling wind left him even stunned and confused. He began to cry because of the unbearable cold, and feared going up the tall staircase all by himself.
As I bent over to put his coat on, I felt an overwhelming sense of gratitude that I had a coat for him to wear. In a way like never before, my heart literally filled with a powerful emotion of gratitude as God made an impression on me by communicating, "You are blessed". I caught a small glimpse of what it must have been like to take my poor children and travel with them across the plains in the severest and most dire conditions as did the early pioneers* and settlers. I had something they didn't, I had the luxury of putting a coat on my child, and a nice pair of shoes. Most importantly, I could tell my little boy with certainty that he would shortly be in a warm place.
Can you imagine the heartache and pain of having your children exposed to the harsh and frigid elements and not being able to do anything about it? Not being able to place a warm jacket on them, or bring them into a nice cozy home warmed by a nice modern heating system? Those dear pioneers who lost children due to exposure - my mind and heart can't even comprehend it.
God bless all those who are out in the cold. God bless all those children who need a blanket, a nice meal, and the assurance that they will soon be somewhere warm. I'm thankful that my children have all this and more.
*Interestingly enough, one of the earlier pioneer companies had set up camp very near to this spot in Wyoming where we were, and more than 200 people died from starvation and cold in the fall of 1856.Labels: blessed, children, cold, homeless, parents, shelter, warm
My Child Is Worth More Than Yours
What price would you put on a child? What price would you put on YOUR children? How about those of Sandy Hook Elementary? What about children in other countries,
are they worth less than us?
It appears they are, according to the viewpoint of some. How can we justify the killing of hundreds of thousands of children in war? Take a view of this 0:23 second clip and let me know your opinions of then US Secretary of State Madeline Albright. Look into her face and eyes, where is the love in them? If you read the description of the video, you will see General Richardson say the same thing. That the policy allowing 500,000 innocent children to die was the right thing. Why does the policy that allows 20 children at Sandy Hook to die need to be changed, while the policy that kills half a million doesn't?
I'm sad to say the answer is because our children our more valuable than other people's children around the world.
But whoso shall offend one of these little ones which believe in me, it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depth of the sea.
Labels: children, death, foreign policy, madeline albright, war
Can Somebody Cry For Me?
I've had this image in my mind for days. I keep seeing this sweet little Iraqi girl sailing into heaven after being killed. This is what she is saying to me, and I don't know how to answer her.
I sail away into the sky
As I stare down below
My home destroyed and family dead
Now to heaven I go
But none will talk of how I died
No cameras are at the scene
No weeping eyes or mourning hearts
Why don’t they cry for me?
Because I'm in a far away land?
My skin is different, I guess
Is that why no one thinks of me
Does this make me any less?
Today I died – a stray bullet they said
My body resting by a tree
I’m just as precious, just as sweet
Why does no one cry for me?
-with liberty and justice for all?
Labels: children, death, guns, innocent, iraqi, newton, war
Why Are You So Annoying, Why?
One of the more well documented annoyances of being a parent is dealing with the cursed "whys". Some experts say that between the ages of 2-4, children are most likely to grill their parents into submission. From my experience, it's more like 2-infinity. At times it is extremely cute, but after a while it becomes insanely annoying.
Why this?
Why that?
Why do this?
Why do that?
Why not this?
Why not that?
Read more »Labels: children, learning, questions, why
Proud Parents
Have you ever met parents who think their kid/s are the best thing that ever happened to the world? They are constantly talking about how great their child is, how he/she is the cutest, the smartest, the best behaved, etc? I've been exposed to a lot of this. Is there anything more annoying? I used to think so, but not anymore. Let me tell you what changed my perspective.
I have a three-year old boy who I love to death. He's always been a daddy's boy. I used to lay with him in his crib at night so he would fall asleep. When I would get out, he would ask me to lay with him a "liddle bih" more. It was hard to say no. When the time came to take away his binkie, I
cried for over an hour in my room because I knew what it meant, he was no longer a baby. (My wife thought I was going nuts) He's been wrapped around my finger from day one.
When he was about nine months old I went on a trip and visited some unnamed people and was able to meet a baby boy born the same day as my boy. As I met him and his parents, and realized his parents were high on drugs at the moment, I held this boy close to me and felt his warm skin and my heart broke for him. His dad had spent his whole life in and out of trouble, in and out of jail, in and out of love, in and out of abusive relationships. His mother was in shambles as well. I knew from other sources that their relationship was rocky and that this child was not getting the care he deserved. As I held this baby in my arms I thought of the sad injustice of it all. What had this child done, or not done, to deserve to be born to a mother and father addicted to drugs? Why was he any less deserving of parents who adore him and could provide him the love, support, time, and everything else a baby wants and needs. That was a hard night. I called my mom and expressed to her how truly shattered I was, knowing this child would be neglected, forgotten, and not loved as he should be.
Ever since that moment, I find great comfort in
parents who love their children more than anything in the world. I'm glad that they have the best kids, the cutest kids, the smartest kids. The reality is, it's probably not true, but IT IS TRUE TO THEM. That's what matters. I thank God for every parent who feels that way about their child, because for every child that is loved with pure love, there is a child who goes without food, goes without warm clothes, goes without a clean diaper, and goes without hugs at night.
I'm reminded of Elder Dallin H. Oaks talk on children in the October General Conference.
"We can all remember our feelings when a little child cried out and reached up to us for help. A loving Heavenly Father gives us those feelings to impel us to help His children."
To all you annoying parents who feel your kids are the best thing that ever happened to the world, never stop feeling that way!
Labels: bragging, caring, children, family, kids, love, parenthood, parents
The Truth about Peanuts
My wife and I made the decision a few years ago to give things to our kids straight. We wanted to be completely honest with them and not beat around the bush or tell them things that would lead to confusion later on. (With the exception of certain bearded men and winged fairies) Before we made this decision we had a bad habit of using alternative words for their anatomy. Some examples are: Julie, don't touch your "private". Or, Mikey don't play with your "friend". Billy, get your hands off your "wee-wee". I know, I know, some strange choices - especially "friend", and that's exactly why we decided to stop.
So, we've started explaining to the kids what a penis and vagina are and have used those words. Those aren't words that are needed often, but there are times when it is appropriate to say it. We hope the kids will appreciate having a knowledge of things at home before they learn them from other sources, be it at school or around friends. We also try to help them understand that those are words that are used appropriately.
A few days ago my three-year old was going to the bathroom and my wife was helping him get his underwear and pants back up. He pointed to his "private" and asked: "Is this my peanut?" You just can't make this stuff up!
As a parent, it's nice to know the things you are teaching your kids are sinking in.
Labels: anatomy, children, education
Through a Child's Eyes
I'm learning how to see again
When I look through my child's eyes
I hold my child close to me
He is mesmerized by the world around him
Each sight is a wonder, each movement full of awe
He is my lens, as I now see what I thought I saw
I'm learning how to see again
The grass is greener than it's ever been
A fluttering bird, the dripping rain
Sunlight upon me, will never be the same
For
all's full of wonder
There is no commonplace
Every scene is a marvel
As I consider my child's face
I can see a new world
Once simple, now great joy
All when I look
Through the eyes of my boy
I'm learning how to see again
I'm soaking it all in
Nothing is taken for granted now
I see the world through him
Ben Arkell
May 26, 2010
Labels: child, children, parenthood
